Crap that pisses me off at movie theaters..

I know we've ALL been through this crap before. Raise your hands!!!

1. Freaking little kids and babies. God please STFU. I wanna stuff my socks in your mouth! Well..first your parents for bringing you there! At least discipline the older ones! When I went to a screening of Avatar these little kids up in the front just kept yelping. To make it even worse when the movie was over they had dropped food and their sodas all over the floor..Nice parents..nice showing how great you are with your kids.. It's a movie theater..not your fucking child's pig-pen..

2. People making out in them. Seriously, stop being attention whores. Nobody cares to see you smooching. You guys need to get a life. Your relationship is not awe-inspiring! I just want to CHUCK my drink at you!!  Next time I'm coming prepared with a sling-shot.

3. People who exaggerate screams and fan-girl shrieks. Again..attention whore.. I don't want to know that you are physically wetting yourself out loud.. Again I'm not talking about the occasional scream. We all do that, I'm talking about obvious fake-O's.

4. People on cell-phones. I want to see the big screen..not a bunch of glowing little screens dotted all over the place. Seriously you have social issues if you can't go a single hour or so without having to chat the shit up the entire movie. Get the fuck out. You paid to WATCH this movie NOT multitask with your damned phone.

5. People who had already seen the movie and doing SPOILERS out loud so that everybody within a 10 foot radius can hear them. STFU!

6. People who are really really loud with their food. I can understand opening that crunchy chip bag but please..I'm sure you have some bag scrunching fetish but be considerate! I don't want to hear "CRISHSHRUUSHHSUCRUSHSHH" every few minutes..

7. Movie theaters that need an upgrade. Kind of sick and tired of seeing a film with random black blotches all over it! Really I watched Avatar in Korea and it was bad. The film was damaged and the sound was off. Actually it was free and hilarious as well..What did I expect.

8. People that smell. Take a bath. Put something on those underarms. Can you not smell yourself?? I wasn't prepared for a 4-D movie!

9. People who hog the armchair space. Give me some damned elbow room! I feel like I'm sitting on an aircraft!!

10. Parents bringing their kids to some scary-ass movie and wonder why they have to leave with screaming kids. Idiot..wait for the dvd or hire a baby-sitter...

11. When leaving the theater, people who just STAND there for no particular reason in the middle of traffic. Get your fat butt out the way and park it somewhere else. I'm ready to leave.

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